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Many Catholics who have lived through the heartbreak of divorce find themselves confused and uncertain about where they stand with the Church, especially regarding the possibility of remarriage. Today, we’ll discuss the Church’s teaching on divorce and the process she has in place for Catholics to possibly remarry. First, we need to clarify the terms. The common term for the end of this process is “annulment;” however, that term implies that the Church can dissolve a valid marriage. The Church cannot end a valid marriage because no one has the power to separate what God has joined together. Rather, the Church examines whether a true marriage ever existed according to God’s design and Church law. If it is determined that the marriage never existed, a “declaration of nullity” is issued (CCC 1629). Let’s look at what the Church teaches about marriage, the main reasons a marriage can be declared null, and what a declaration means (and does not mean) for the parties and their children.

The Catholic Church takes the Sacrament of Holy Matrimony very seriously. Marriage is a covenant of life and love ordered to the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of children (CCC 1601, 1652; Code of Canon Law (CIC) can. 1055). By entering this covenant, a man and a woman become one flesh, and their bond becomes unbreakable, as God’s covenants with his people are unbreakable. This teaching is rooted in Scripture. Jesus teaches that marriage is a permanent union joined by God and that divorcing and remarrying another is committing the sin of adultery. When the Pharisees ask Jesus whether it is lawful for a man to divorce his wife, he points back to creation in Genesis, stating: “What God has joined together, no human being must separate.” He explains that Moses permitted divorce only because of the people’s “hardness of heart,” but that it was not meant to be that way from the beginning (cf. Matthew 19:3–6, Mark 10:2–9). For these reasons, the Church does not permit divorce. This teaching protects the dignity of the vocation and the good of children and society; it is not meant to be uncompassionate to people in difficult marriages but to uphold the truth.

For a marriage to be a valid covenant, four essential elements must be present. Consent to marry must be free, faithful, fruitful, and total (cf. CCC 1643). Both parties must freely choose to marry. Consent is not free if either party is forced, coerced, or pressured into marriage. They agree to be faithful and commit themselves to one person in a lifelong conjugal relationship. They must be open to the gift of children and raise them in the faith. This does not mean a marriage must produce children to be valid. The Church recognizes factors such as infertility. What is required is openness to children. Finally, they must give themselves completely to one another without reservation, including their bodies, lives, and fertility. When all these elements are present, the Church considers a marriage valid and therefore indissoluble. When beginning the annulment process, the Church presumes every marriage is valid until proven otherwise (CIC can. 1060).

A declaration of nullity is a judgment by a Church tribunal that, from the beginning (ab initio), at least one essential element required for a valid marriage was missing. Therefore, the bond never existed in the way the Church understands marriage. It is not a Catholic divorce; it is not a judgment on whether the relationship was happy, loving, or long-lasting; it is not a statement that the children are illegitimate (they remain legitimate); and it is not a denial that a real human relationship existed. Because obtaining a declaration of nullity is a judicial process, the tribunal gathers evidence through an investigation. Each party will provide statements, documents, witnesses who knew one or both parties at the time of consent, and sometimes expert psychological reports. After a thorough investigation, the tribunal can conclude that the marriage never existed, and the parties are then free to marry (CCC 1629). If the marriage is found to be valid, the Church encourages the couple to reconcile, with appropriate help if necessary, and to continue receiving the sacraments as a source of grace, provided they go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation for any mortal sins and remain faithful within the marriage.

Without providing an exhaustive list, grounds for a declaration of nullity fall into three broad categories: diriment impediments, defects of consent, and defects of canonical form (CIC can. 1073-1107). Diriment impediments are obstacles that prevent a person from validly marrying. These may include insufficient age, prior marriage, an unbaptized party who did not receive a dispensation, holy orders, or perpetual impotence that began before the marriage. Defects of consent are the most common grounds. They may include ignorance of the essential nature of marriage, entering into the marriage under fraud or deceit that may seriously disturb conjugal life, force or grave fear, or an intent to exclude one of the essential elements of marriage (fidelity, permanence, openness to children). While the couple confers the sacrament themselves through their vows, marriage must be celebrated before a sacred minister and two witnesses. A lack of proper canonical form renders the marriage invalid. Whatever the grounds for a declaration of nullity, the defect must have existed when consent was exchanged. Later problems, such as infidelity or loss of love, do not, in themselves, prove nullity.

Because of no-fault divorce, sometimes one spouse does not want a divorce but cannot legally prevent it. The innocent party may choose to continue honoring their covenant and remain faithful, since, in the eyes of God and the Church, the marriage bond remains intact. In these cases, the innocent party need not seek an annulment, and he or she may remain prayerfully committed to his or her spouse and continue to receive the sacraments without guilt. The party who initiated the divorce may or may not seek a declaration of nullity, but nothing prevents the other spouse from remaining faithful.

The breakdown of a marriage can be a very difficult and painful process, taking an emotional, spiritual, and relational toll on one or both parties, the children, and others around the couple. The Church recognizes and understands this and takes a pastoral approach for Catholics in this situation. Divorced Catholics are not excommunicated and remain full members of the Church. They may continue to receive the Sacraments of Reconciliation and Holy Eucharist unless they are in another physical relationship or have remarried. Remarrying without a declaration of nullity is considered adultery, and continuing to receive the Eucharist would be a grave sin. If you are in this situation, please seek counsel from a priest as soon as possible. While the Church affirms the permanence of marriage, no one is expected to remain in an abusive or unsafe situation. In marriages involving domestic violence, abuse, or severe addiction, physical separation may be necessary to protect the life and safety of the innocent party and children. The innocent party has no moral difficulty or sin in separating for safety reasons. When physical separation is deemed necessary, it ought to be with the intent to reconcile after the issues of concern have been addressed and healed, whether or not reconciliation ever occurs. Children are uniquely and deeply affected by divorce, and special attention should be paid to them. Parishes ought to provide support and resources for healing for children and the entire fractured family.

Ultimately, the Church’s responsibility is to lead souls to heaven. She does this by teaching the truth about Jesus and his teachings. Her teachings on marriage and divorce are rooted in truth, and even if they are misunderstood, they are meant to protect our eternal souls. Even the most difficult marriages can be reconciled and healed with God’s grace. If you feel your marriage is hopeless, Retrouvaille is a program that helps couples heal and rebuild marriages experiencing severe conflict or breakdown. Many miracles have taken place through Retrouvaille. Whether your marriage is difficult or not, read some of these miracle stories at retrouvaille.org to see how God’s grace works in the Sacrament of Marriage.

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